Viewing 5 posts - 1 through 5 (of 5 total)
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  • #5580

    Denaqueenbee
    Participant

    Hello everyone. I keep hoping to see someone post they got the Post TMS results, I’m now over 2 weeks done, and things are bad. I’m having feelings I’ve never had before, especially anger, and just mean feeling. I keep praying it will settle down, but it seems to be worsening.

    My thinking seems to have cleared up a bit, but I feel more dead than ever, and I fear snapping at work, like I can’t do this, not one more day, not more more hour, not one more minute. What the heck is going on?

    Any input appreciated

    denaqueenbee

    #5581

    luvmipuppy
    Participant

    Hi Dena,
    I know it can be stressful when someone doesn’t respond right away on the forum, at a time when we desperately need answers to what we’re experiencing. So I wanted to chat with you and see if I can offer some support in anyway possible. I have not yet completed my treatment, to be able to speak on my own experience just yet…today was #21. But after reading your post, I tried to look up some information on it…and I didn’t seem to find anything about the dip happening post treatment. Most of what I read is that it can happen and is most common during. But there are a lot of studies yet to be done on TMS post treatment results, which doesn’t mean there is nothing they can do to help you feel better, it only means we try anything possible to get relief whether documented results are there or not. Were you able to speak with your TMS treating physician to discuss your concerns, and what can be done to help what you’re experiencing? How many total treatments did they provide you? I am scheduled for 38 so far. I’ve read the average is anywhere from 20-40, and completely depends on the each person’s individual needs and not to receive less than the 20. Since you have not gotten relief yet, does that mean they need to extend your # of sessions? Is that something your TMS office had discussed with you? If not, can you ask them about it and/or give you advisement of what you can do? I’ve heard of the treatment not working for some but not for it to make you feel worse than you did before. Try consulting with the doctor, I would hope they can guide you in the right direction.

    #5582

    Dee Pressed
    Participant

    Hi Dena
    So sorry to see you are feeling so bad. I agree with luvmipuppy on the post above. Get back to the TMS office and insist on talking with the doctor. We had chatted before on another TMS post. I don’t recall how many TMS sessions you had or if they tapered you of the TMS before stopping it.
    I sure hope you can get some answers for why you are feeling the way you are. Please keep us updated, and again I am sorry you are feeling so bad, and I am sure that word doesn’t even cover how you feel.
    I am 4 sessions from being done with TMS, and my emotions some days are all over the place. I have no idea why.
    If you need to talk leave a message here. I’m a night owl most nights, but the TMS zonks me out sometimes. People here care.

    #5583

    Denaqueenbee
    Participant

    I have not been on the computer in a few days, and it was so nice to both posts with support! Thank you so much! In all the research I had done,I never heard of TMS making things worse. One day, at beginning of my TMS, I found the Forum and then saw someone said it did make their anxiety worse, and that scared me, so I stayed off the forums for a bit. I had 31 treatments, they weaned the last few, staggered by about 4 days apart because my insurance won’t pay and I already spent 6k. I Now my benefits are exhausted for the year, Insurance was so screwed up, I feel such hate, and I have never been so hateful feeling. They are enough to make you feel that way LOL. (really not funny though)

    TMS place gave me another appointment with the Psychiatrist with no additional charge for tomorrow. I am going to let him know, and how scared I am. It REALLY DOES Seem emotions are all over the place, isn’t that strange? I’ve noticed problems with my short term memory, I think (hope) it will settle down. (this is something I’ve never experience before TMS?) I am praying it’s that my mind is healing, and it’s neurons firing all over the place in my brain. I don’t feel quite as agitated, but I might in an hour!

    Those torture feelings of ” something is weird with my brain that can’t be fixed” are just terrible. I still have hope, I won’t give up, I’ve heard too many people say it was months after TMS they really noticed changes. But I’m back to that ” what to do now “, I don’t know how I’ll ever make it in life, at 60, I’m ready to just give up. What life? Depression robs us of “who we are” and makes every day just a huge chore to get through. Thank you again for you Posts…………….. It really helped this morning.

    Dena

    #5584

    luvmipuppy
    Participant

    Hi Dena. I am so happy to hear that you got to see our posts, and to be reassured that we are here for you, when you need help and support. I am soooo glad to hear the place you’ve been going for TMS has given you a follow up dr appt. and that you’ll have a chance to discuss all of your concerns with how you’re feeling. So great!! Please let us know how it goes. I am very sad to hear you say you want to give up, but also completely understand the feelings! I have been there MANY times too, when we just feel exhausted with all the work it takes to exist every day, that it feels like this is just soooo much effort. Continue to write us with your feelings, and let us help you in anyway we can. Sometimes just others understanding how we feel and what we go through each day, can help so much more than anyone can realize. When I’ve had moments of feeling good, and some clarity, is when I think I want to keep fighting this and pray that those sporadic moments of relief will become longer and longer with time. Still too early to tell. I heard the same thing you did, by some TMS patients who have experienced their relief some weeks after their treatments. So there is still hope you can feel better with time. Please hang in there and talk to us as much as you need to. You may need some add on treatments, which I’ll mention in a sec. I wanted to tell you not to be too concerned with the memory loss your experiencing. I cannot say that from a medical standpoint, I can only say from my experience and what I’ve learned through lots of doctor appointments and research. From what I’ve heard about TMS it should not cause any permanent memory loss, but I’d mention that at your dr appt, just to let them know and I’d hope they can reassure you the same. I have found that I experience the worst memory loss when I have such heightened anxiety, and my depression is making it so hard to concentrate. And that snowballs into loss of good sleep, and sometimes need to take something for the anxiety. Between anxiety meds, depression and lack of sleep, that is an almost certain cocktail for what appears to be memory loss. I think it has a great deal to do with the depression, and how our brains are so overwhelmed every minute of every day, that we are bound to not remember things. That actually improved for me, as I lessened the amount of anxiety meds I take (which memory loss is a sure side effect) and on the days I feel some relief I notice I don’t have to work hard to think at all, which is the most amazing feeling, but not a sustainable feeling for me just yet. But during those times the memory is so much better! It’s crazy what depression can effect in us! I know how hard it can be to have hope when you feel as low as you do, and I have also felt the same hopelessness more times than I’d like to count. I believe it takes TONS of courage on our part to fight through the days, try various treatments available to us, (covered by insurance would be ideal) and unfortunately go through the motions of the continual ‘trial and error’ until we each find our own mix of what works. And that too is a frustrating process…but the only way to get there is to keep trying something else when one thing doesn’t work. I MUST tell you and EVERYONE who reads this, that I had found something that I’ve used along with antidepressants and TMS, that is ACUPUNCTURE. It is quite possibly the most amazing thing I’ve experienced! It does not do the trick as a stand alone treatment. But it can provide some much needed relief!! It helps tremendously with anxiety, and helps battle with depression, but alone has not been able to completely tackle it, which is why it works amazingly as an add-on to the other treatments I’m on (TMS and antidepressants). In some cases TMS can help someone get off their meds. In other cases it is very necessary to stay on them…maybe in lower doses to reduce side effects, but may still be needed as part of our treatment plan. Are you currently taking anything? Maybe it has not been working for you, and something else to mention to your dr. The TMS dr may refer you to your regular psych dr if they do not handle your med mgmt. Just a few things to think about. Please feel free to ask me ANY questions you have about anything mentioned in my post, and I will check email to see what you respond, so I can get back to you. I am praying for you to have a great appointment tomorrow, and that they have some recommendations for you. Please let us know how you make out. Sending Supportive Hugs to you!!

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